Saturday, March 28, 2009

Saturday Morning Cartoons

Here' one of the newest episodes of one of my favorite shows Family Guy. The episode is entitled Family Gay, so prepare to laugh your ass off. Enjoy.

Sorry that I forgot to post up a friday night jam last night. My work schedule has been screwy and I didn't realize what day it was. As my punishment, I'll be available for public flogging in my bedroom after 10 tonight. wink wink nod nod.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Wax On Wax Off

I love a good ad that makes me laugh and this one accomplished just that.

"Hi there Curly, is your mom home?"


Thursday, March 26, 2009

This Is Just Sad

Some people make it too easy. I saw this vid a couple of weeks ago and wasn't going to share it, but I can't help it. The bulldawg in me says I have to. Corrine Brown is a Democratic Representative from the great state of Florida. She was elected to the house in 1982. How she has remained there all this time is a mystery to me. Maybe it's her degree in Communication/Speech from Edward Waters College, her masters in Education and bachelors in sociology from Florida A&M, or her Education Specialist degree from The University of Florida. All those need investigating in my book. After you see this, I'm sure you'll feel the same. BTW, she's a HUGE Gators fan.

Seriously...WTF? This bitch has a 2nd grade reading level tops and she is an education specialist? The communications/speech degree is extremely baffling. How has the semi retarded woman remained in politics? She's been involved in a shit load of controversy over the years. This speaks so highly of politics in this country. Here's the remix...

GO GATOR. Go Corch Urban Meyers and Percey Harvey. LMAO. Gator Fans... You must be so proud. Her speech is right up there with Tebow's legendary speech.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Good, The Bad, And The Sequel

So before I introduce this next piece, let me apologize for the 3 day hiatus. I've had a house guest from L.A., so I've been preoccupied. Anyways, I'm back, so you can call off the search parties. If you're a regular reader of my site, then you probably remember the video of my friend Justin Pruitt performing the song The Ecstasy of Gold from The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly. If not, look it up in my archives, it's pretty damn awesome. Well he posted a follow up to it today and I figured ya'll would also enjoy it. Here's Justin performing the theme song from The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly...

Be sure to visit YouTube and show him some love.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Why White People Shouldn't Dunk

They say white men can't jump, that's not entirely true. It's the cooridination that's required to complete a dunk that kicks our ass. See exhibit a: Here's Adam Waddell of the Wyoming Cowboys getting a little overly ambitious during this year's NIT tourney...

Friday, March 20, 2009

The Little Bat That Could

For those of you who haven't heard, when the space shuttle Discovery was launched on March 15th, a small free tailed bat was holding on for dear life to the external fuel tank. He held on through launch but probably perished soon after. A wildlife expert who examined video of the bat says he likely had a broken wing and a problem with his wrist or shoulder. Internet speculation is that the brave little creature dreamed of flying again. Some save he bravely went where no bat has gone before. Either way... He will be missed.

Farewell and Godspeed, you brave little bastard...

Friday Night Jam

It's Friday people, and you know what that means... Friday Night Jam! Here's one of my favorite songs off the first tape (that's what we had before Cd's kids) I ever owned, DEF LEPPARD HYSTERIA... Pour Some Sugar On Me!!!!!

If that doesn't get you ready to party... GET THE HELL OUTTA MY COUNTRY!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Opposite Ends Of The Spectrum

Birds are highly intelligent animals...

And then there's squirrels. They fall into the not so much category...

Reminds me of myself on a good Friday night.

White Bread

Anyone around my age, had to love them some Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. If they said they didn't, they're a habitual liar! All Fresh Prince lovers had to enjoy Carlton Banks and his crazy-ass dance. Poor Carlton was like an Oreo cookie, black on the outside, but white on the inside. I saw this over on Neatorama today and it made me laugh, so I decided to share... because sharing is caring!

...and if that wasn't enough of a throwback for you, check this out. Carlton, whose real name is Alfonso Ribeiro, is actually a great dancer. He appeared in a 1984 Pepsi commercial with Michael Jackson and sold his own dance instruction video.

"It's the safe way to break and pop"

Gotta love the 80's.

Unnecessary Censorship

Sesame Street would've been a whole hell of a lot more interesting like this...

"When I'm alone I *BLEEP* myself!"

One Bleep..ah ah ah. Here's another good vid that would've made Sesame Street better, unfortunately I couldn't find it in it's entirety, but it's still good.

"How'd you get the disease Dangle?" "From Fuckin!"

Last Minute Humor

Some last minute St. Patty's Day jokes to celebrate one awesome holiday.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Why I Fly Southwest

Them mofos over at Delta ain't got nothing on this!

"You will not get that on United Airlines"

Brush that dirt off your shoulder David. Somebody needs to give this guy a promotion.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Happy St. Patty's Day From Alabama

There are stereotypes in life and then there are the people who live up to them. These people fall into the latter category.

"Everybody who seen da Leprechaun say yeah!!"

How fucking stupid can you be? These people destroy what little faith I have in future of our society, but atleast they're entertaining. I particularly like the "Irish" guy with the magic flute. Happy St. Patrick's Day!

The Good, The Bad, And The Friggin Awesome!

The Good The Bad The Ugly Pictures, Images and Photos

I have a buddy from high school who I haven't really seen since the good ol' days. He's one of the many old friends I keep up with through Facebook. Anyways he posted a vid up today that really shows off his talent on the guitar and I decided that ya'll might also enjoy it as I did. Here's Justin Pruitt performing the famous song, from The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly, The Ecstasy Of Gold.

Pretty damn impressive in my book. Definitely falls under the good.

My Money Was On The Snake

The animal kingdom is a wild place man. Animals do some scrazy things. Watch what happens when a rabbit decides to tangle with a very large snake. The result will surprise you.

Is that not the world's most bad ass rabbit since Bugs Bunny?

fudd Pictures, Images and Photos

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Grand Funk Youtube

There's a lot of creative, talented people on YouTube, such as whoever created the Mr Roboto vid found here... . lol! Well, a guy named Ophir Kutiel, aka Kutiman, mashed several vids of these creative folks into an entire album called Thru You ( ). Here's the first track off that album.

Mother Of All Funk Chords

And here's another I really like.

This Is What It Became

Thank God for YouTube and the awesomeness it rains down on us. By the way, if you like my Mr Roboto vid, please rate it and leave comments. Thanks guys.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Creativity At Its Best

When some nerd first envisioned the Internet in the 80's, I'm sure he never figured that immature people, such as myself, would have access to it. Well luckily he was wrong! Otherwise we wouldn't have such web gems as this.

What can I say except YEAH!!!!!!!

Friday Night Jam

Another week has passed and it's that time again. Here's your Friday Night Jam, The Gap Band, Oops Upside Your Head! When I was a kid, I used to love me some Gap Band. This shit is classic so enjoy the privilege of hearing it.

80's style baby! And since I'm feeling generous this week, you get a double dose of awesomeness. Here's the always smooth Snoop Dogg bringing the 80's and 90's together with Snoops Upside Your Head.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Touching Commercial

This is a pretty deep commercial. Big props to Coke-A-Cola for something meaningful in advertising.

"I've lived in worst moments than these, but in the end, you'll only remember the good things"

If only every young child could learn the lessons of a man over a century old. Even in the world we live in, with all the evil and sadness around us, we should celebrate birth and the brightness on the horizen.

Why You Shouldn't Assume Things

Listen to this song and then feel ashamed of your dirty mind...

Get your mind outta the gutter. Pervert.

Fishing Poles Are Overrated

About a week ago, I did a post called Southern Noodles. It was about the sport of Noodlin', catching catfish with your bare hands. Well this guy must of saw that post, and decided to take it to the next level...


Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Bored At Work

bender dance Pictures, Images and Photos

Whether or not you like your job, you gotta love the people there. Sure you prolly can't stand a couple of them, but it's the characters that keep life interesting. One of my good buddies at work is Ramon. We get along well, mainly because we both served in the military and we're both silly as fuck. Anyways, he was putting on a steam suit today at work that makes him look like bender from futurama. Well of course the mouse started running in the wheel and the light bulb went off in my head. So enjoy the creation of my crazy mind along with some help from a dancing Puerto Rican in a steam suit!

That's funny right there, I don't care who you are! Domo Arigato Mr. Matias!

Monday, March 9, 2009

How My Funeral Should Be

I consider myself to be a manly man. Meat and potatoes, no rabbit food... know what I mean? Therefore, I'm not a big fan of chick flicks, but seeing as how I really enjoy movies and women, I occasionally tolerate one and if it is decent, I'm not afraid to admit it. Well, one of those chick flicks that I happen to actually like is Elizabethtown. The entire movie is great, but my favorite scene is the funeral scene. I took a facebook/myspace survey today and the last question was what song do you want played at your funeral. My answer was Freebird. I want it to be just like the scene in this movie, without all the people in a panic.

That is hands down the greatest funeral scene ever. So, to my friends and family and any of my readers who give a shit, I wanna be cremated and I want Freebird played at my funeral. I'd prefer a live band, but only if they're good, because I don't want the solo to be cut short. I want it to be a celebration of my life. I'm sure you'll all be sad, but just be happy for me to be in a better place. And please drink some for me afterwards.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

The Demise

Candy Cigarettes Pictures, Images and Photos

I remember when I was a kid, I used to enjoy smoking candy cigarettes. I guess it was because it made me feel like I was doing something adults do, just like drinking root beer in the old brown bottles or chewing big league chew...and playing doctor with the girl down the street! lol, that last part was a joke. The more I think on it, I don't doubt candies like these led a lot of kids into the real thing. But the newest fad makes me worry. Watch as this little badass hellyun shows you how to smoke smarties...

When they start snorting pixie sticks it's game over people!

Saturday, March 7, 2009

UFC 96

UFC 96 is tonight. The main event is Keith "The Dean of Mean" Jardine vs Quinton "Rampage" Jackson. This should be a great fight. I see Rampage ending this no later than the second round.

Here are a few Rampage Highlights...

Alabama Rehab

A lot of people going through rehab are often in denial about their addiction, but this guy takes it to another level...

"Watch out Sally"

Saturday Morning Cartoons

Yet another great cartoon from Luis Castanon. The Ghetto Antenna 2000...

"You's a punk yo, take me home!"

Friday, March 6, 2009

Friday Night Jam

It's that time of week again. Pour up your favorite drink and enjoy one of my favorite song from the 90's. Big Pun feat. Joe, Don't Wanna Be A Playa...

"I'm not a playa I just fuck alot"

I'm at work tonight, so ya'll drink one or ten for me.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Why I Miss The Marines

The Few, The Proud, The Marines... I've never been so proud as I was the day I graduated boot camp from Parris Island, South Carolina. To this day anytime I get to talk about the Corps or see even a commercial for the Marines, I swell up with pride. The life of being a Marine cannot be described. The Corps is a different world. I originally started this post to get on my soap box and tell you my feelings about the war and the involvement of the media and the everyday American in it. Instead I'll let this clip sum it up...

"You want me on that wall, you need me on that wall"

Basically, my feelings are if you're not a soldier or haven't been one, keep your fucking opinion to yourself. You don't understand what's going on over there and you never will. Get the news cameras out of Iraq and let the soldiers do their job. There is a mission over there that can not be completed in a politically correct manner. It's not pretty, because war is an ugly thing. So either pick up a gun and fight, or shut the fuck up.

Now back to my beloved Marines. After watching that clip, I got all nostalgic. When I watch military movies, particularly ones that involve Marines, I get all pissy. You see, I love a good war movie, but I can't stand the liberties that Hollywood takes because they make the movie fake to me. I see the little things that I know aren't true to life. So when I see truly good flicks about Marines, that really gets it right, I fall in love. They bring back all the right memories, and sometimes nightmares, of the things I miss about being a Marine. The clip from A Few Good Men above is just one of those. Here are couple more of my favorites; this is a close to real life as it gets.

"you will be a minister of death, praying for war"

"Thall shall not kill...FUCK THAT SHIT!"
(I apologize for the video quality, my original was removed and this is the best replacement I could find)

And now for real life...

"get away before you get murdered!"

And now a quick poke at the Army, seeing as how I also was in the Army, I can do that...


Even though I'm a big boy now... that shit is funny. Because atleast when I was active duty, I looked like this...



US Marines Pictures, Images and Photos

The Whole World's Gone Crazy

hannibal Pictures, Images and Photos

WINNIPEG, Manitoba – A Canadian judge ruled Thursday that a man accused of beheading and cannibalizing a fellow Greyhound bus passenger is not criminally responsible due to mental illness.

The decision means Chinese immigrant Vince Li will be treated in a mental institution instead of going to prison. The family of victim Tim McLean dismissed the trial as a "rubber stamp" that allows Li to get away with murder.

"A crime was still committed here, a murder still occurred," said Carol DeDelley, McLean's mother. "There was nobody else on that bus holding a knife, slicing up my child."

The judge said Li should not be held criminally accountable for stabbing McLean dozens of times last July and dismembering his body while horrified passengers fled.

Justice John Scurfield said Li's attack was "grotesque" and "barbaric" but "strongly suggestive of a mental disorder."

"He did not appreciate the actions he committed were morally wrong. He believed he was acting in self-defense," Scurfield said.

Both the prosecution and the defense argued Li can't be held responsible because Li was suffering from schizophrenia and believed God wanted him to kill McLean because the young man was a force of evil.

He will be institutionalized without a criminal record and will be reassessed every year by a mental health review board to determine if he is fit for release into the community.

DeDelley said a yearly hearing is ridiculous, and that Li should be locked up for the rest of his life.

Li's trial barely lasted two days and only heard from two witnesses, both psychiatrists, who testified he is mentally ill.

That Li killed the 22-year-old carnival worker was never in question at the trial. Li has admitted he killed McLean but pleaded not guilty.

Witnesses said Li attacked McLean unprovoked as their bus traveled at night along a desolate stretch of the Trans-Canada Highway.

An agreed statement of facts between the prosecution and defense detailed how passengers stood outside the bus as Li stabbed McLean dozens of times and beheaded and mutilated his body. Finding himself locked inside the bus, Li finally escaped through a window and was arrested.

Li then apologized and pleaded with police to kill him.

Police said McLean's body parts were found throughout the bus in plastic bags, and the victim's ear, nose and tongue were found in Li's pocket.

A psychiatrist called by the prosecution Wednesday testified that Li cut up McLean's body because he believed that he would come back to life and take revenge.

McLean's family is vowing to turn their attention to fighting the law that allows people who are found not criminally responsible to be released into the community once they are deemed well, without serving a minimum sentence in jail.

DeDelley said her son didn't die in vain. His death highlights concerns about the justice system, she said.

"Now people are aware that there is a problem," she said.

As if you didn't already know, this further proves that the judicial system is totally screwed up. I'm just glad this psycho is in Canada and not here. Seriously, What The Fuck is wrong with society? Mentally ill? No shit Sherlock. I remember when this brutal act happened and I was in disbelief as I read it. I just knew this guy would get the chair... but no. This guy gets to sit in a mental hospital until he convinces some shrink he's not crazy anymore, then he'll get out and do it again. I hate when someone does some psycho shit like this and gets off on mental illness. OF COURSE THEY'RE CRAZY!! Normal people do not cut people's heads off. Normal people do not eat people. That doesn't mean he should get off without punishment. Kill his crazy ass. We all have thoughts of killing somebody from time to time.... the difference is we don't do it! We let that shit slide. If only they handled things like this....

"And soldiers we shall be, for thee my lord for thee"

The Boondock Saints had it right. Kill the truly corrupt and let God sort em' out!

Stop.... Hammer Time!!!


Saw this over on Neatorama. Too damn funny.

U Cant Touch This - MC Hammer
"Break it down"

Dude...I wish rap music was still this simple and fun. Hammer was entirely too awesome. There are very few people my age who can say they didn't love that damn song. And if anyone does say that, they are a damn liar. How about them pants? Could anyone other than Hammer pull those off? That's why he was 2 legit... 2 legit 2 quit!!!

MC Hammer - 2 Legit 2 Quit - MC Hammer

Sorry, if I'm gonna mention Hammer, I gotta come correct and give you the double dose! I don't wanna disrespect the man. Please don't hurt em' Hammer.

Why I Got Fired From Work

Why I was fired....

For the last company picnic, management decided that, due to liability issues, we could have alcohol, but only one (1) drink per person.

I was fired for ordering the cups.

I received this as an email today and it totally cracked me up.... because I would seriously do that.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Worse Backseat Drivers Ever

Two pissed off a car. I guess they got tired of walking.

"Turn Left!!! Turn Left!!! I SAID LEFT DAMMIT!!!"

This is all very explainable, as wild as it may seem. I have a good feeling that Dumb and Dumber is their favorite movie and they were simply reenacting their favorite scene.


Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Freestyle Impersonations

I'm a huge fan of stand-up comedy. Ever since I was a little kid, comedians have captured my attention. I love to make people laugh and so I always wanted to be a comedian. I soon found out that most comedians never make it big or make very much money, so that pretty much killed that idea, but I still would love to do an amateur night someday. Aries Spears is a comedian I really enjoy. He's very funny and a great impersonator. Watch as he freestyles and does impersonations at the same time, it's pretty damn cool.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Southern Noodles

Nobody, and I mean nobody, does it like we do it in the Dirty South! Everything is different and better down here and that's what I love. One of our southern traditions that is unique to us is Noodlin'. For those of you not familiar with it, Noodlin' is the act of fishing with your bare hands, particularly for catfish. Noodlers find a catfish hole and stick their arms inside, hoping for the catfish to become defensive and bite down on their arms. It doesn't get much more country than that. Why I must admit I've never been, I do plan on going soon. This is a redneck extreme sport and a rite of passage I must experience for myself. Why it doesn't sound that difficult of a sport, noodlers often get minor injuries such as cuts, but they face a much greater danger from snakes, gators, and possibly even death by drowning. Not to mention that these catfish can weigh close to 100 lbs. This is redneck entertainment at its best. Enjoy watching one of the many games rednecks play.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Facebook Summarized

For all my Facebook users out there, you'll really get a kick out of this vid. Listen as some grey bloke drops knowledge on what Facebook is really all about. You'll find it to be a pretty accurate description. It's basically a dead on account of Myspace too.

"People I sometimes see"

Now don't play you don't know what the hell he's talking about. We all have Facebook or Myspace friends that we haven't seen in years or sometimes have never even met. It's even to the point that one of the first things I ask people is if they have a Myspace page. Unfortunately, our lives have become so busy, that it is often the best way to keep up with folks and it will often tell you a lot more about them than they will. So to all my social networking people out there, keep stalking me...

"thats the song you could be ripping off with geico"

Geico Money Pictures, Images and Photos

The End Of The Story

It's a sad day in America. An American legend and icon, Paul Harvey, has passed at age 90. I've listened to Mr. Harvey literally my entire life. I've learned a lot of little facts in life from Paul. His voice was so comforting and his stories so interesting, that it never even matter what he was speaking about, you would listen anyways. He will be truly missed. Below is a brief documentary done on his life.

I can't believe I will never again turn on the radio and hear Mr. Harvey. Here are just a few of his pieces.

And now you know... the rest of the story. And here is what Mr. Harvey believes the man upstairs thinks the rest of the story is.

Paul Harvey...thanks for the memories, Good Day.